67 Inspiring Quotes By Mark Twain

Looking for the best Mark Twain quotes? We’ve compiled a list of the top 67 most inspiring Twain quotes on life, travel, happiness, success and more.

Top 67 Famous Mark Twain Quotes

1. “There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.”

2. “Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”

3. “It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.”

4. “The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.”

5. “Don't let schooling interfere with your education.”

6. “Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.”

7. “If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”

8. “The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”

9. “The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

10. “A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.”

10. “Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.”

11. “The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.”

12. “The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in Heaven.”

13. “A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

14. “Buy land, they're not making it anymore.”

15. “The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.”

16. “Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.”

17. “When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.”

18. “A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.”

19. “The finest clothing made is a person’s own skin, but, of course, society demands something more than this.”

20. “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

21. “A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.”

22. “Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.”

23. “Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.”

24. “A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.”

25. “One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.”

26. “Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.”

27. “I make it a rule never to smoke while I’m sleeping.”

28. . “If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.”

29. “Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to.”

30. “Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned.”

31. “The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.”

32. “When you find yourself on the side of the majority, it it time to pause and reflect.”

33. “There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.”

34. “There are lies, damned lies and statistics.”

35. “Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation.”

36. “There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one - keep from telling their happiness to the unhappy.”

37. “ 'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.”

38. “Be careless in your dress if you must, but keep a tidy soul.”

39. “The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.”

40. “Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.”

41. “Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.”

42. “The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

43. “Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.”

44. “Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.”

45. “To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.”

46. “Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.”

47. “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”

48. “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”

49. “The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.”

50. “Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.”

51. “Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you would rather have talked.”

52. “It is wiser to find out than suppose.”

53. “Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.”

54. “The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

55. “Give every day the chance to become the most beautiful of your life.”

56. “I hve never let my schooling interfere with my education.”

57. “Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection.”

58. “It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.”

59. “Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.”

60. “Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.”

61. “Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.”

62. “Optimist: day dreamer more elegantly spelled.”

63. “Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does the work.”

64. “Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.”

65. “Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.”

66. “Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.”

67. “I make it a rule never to smoke while I’m sleeping.”

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